Small Town Villainy
by Master Pencil
Summary: What if the Disney Villains lived in a small town where they lived normal, every-day lives? That is what Bill the News Reporter is finding out in the town of Eville by investigating their little hideaway.
1. Chapter 1 My Scary Introduction

**Small Town Villainy**

**By Master Pencil**

Chapter 1 My Scary Introduction

It was a very interesting time really. I thought it was going to be a joke, but when you're dealing with bad guys, it's hardly a joke. What I'm going to tell you may sound silly from a Disney Fan's standpoint, but trust me, it'll make some sense.

After their unsuccessful siege of House of Mouse, the Disney Villains were fed up with everyone. They left to a secretive valley where they founded a town of villains, almost a little escape from the pesky heroes and everything that wasn't theirs.

It was the town of Eville, A small town reminiscent to an American style town, but one with residents that were anything but ordinary. Unlike most evil hideouts and lairs, this town was not a very spooky, dark, or otherwise evil place. They wanted to blend in from everybody so the heroes wouldn't track them down.

It required little time to build with dark magic, and they thought they would have it made. But not too long after its founding, the Disney Heroes discovered their antics. Preparing for the biggest battle ever, the villains then discovered that the heroes felt they were missing out on the fun. And so the Disney Heroes founded their own town, Heroesburg, only several miles away from Eville.

Yes, I know, it sounds pretty weird right? Well that's what I thought too when I was told to report the news in Eville about the whole small town business. Being a news reporter, I had to go there, thinking that journalism just reached a new low.

I thought Eville was going to be such a weird place, but I was only going to be reporting the issue. I also thought the villains wouldn't care about my presence. Boy was I wrong.

Approaching the town in my car, it looked like any normal place. Buildings seemed normal, there was a courthouse, several restaurants and shops… did I just see _"Cruella's Fur Hall?"_ Good thing my colleague was driving, because I would have screeched to a halt right there.

I paid more attention to the names and buildings. It was weird that there was nobody around. I saw _"Madame Medusa's Pawn Shop", "Hyena Meat Market", _and _"J. Worthington Insurance"_…this place scared me.

We soon came to a neighborhood, and still there was no one to be seen. Finally, I got a jolt when I looked up in the trees to see a huge python tangled around in one of them. Another scary sight was a large mansion that had a very spooky design. It was out of place in the neighborhood and every window was shut.

After leaving the neighborhood, we came to a fairly important looking building that my boss told me was their city hall. I was dropped off here, and I hesitated to go inside.

But when I replaced the fear with my earlier thoughts of _"Oh, it's just a joke, this ought to be easy", _I entered the city hall, bracing myself to be flooded with henchmen, monsters, ghouls… nobody was even here!

I almost chuckled as I walked down the large room. At least there was someone at the counter that I guessed was the secretary.

"Excuse me, but where's the mayor?" I asked. The secretary popped up, and I almost jumped away. The secretary was a parrot, Iago to be exact!

"Yeah, he's waitin' for ya," he said.

"Where is everybody?" I asked.

"Everybody doesn't come out til' night time, and its _fun_," he told me. He said "fun" in a very sinister way.

I continued through the hallway of doors until I finally came upon it.

**Mayor's Office**

I knocked, and I saw a tall figure come up to the door with sharp edges jutting from his shoulders, a pumpkin shaped hat, and a somewhat lanky posture. The memory jumped to my head immediately, but it was too late.

The door opened to reveal Jafar, and if I was a kid, I would have run away screaming. He had a darkly delighted smile and his voice… that super slick voice… really got to me.

"Welcome to the town of Eville," he said.

"_Let the fun begin," _I nervously thought.


	2. Chapter 2 Mayor Jafar

Chapter 2 Mayor Jafar

"Come in," he beckoned me. I tried to walk casually into his office, but walking behind the shadow of a villain was pretty nerve-racking for me. I learned from little kid times that you should stay out of evil peoples' business, but this was my job, so into the office of Mayor Jafar I went.

The office was like any mayor's except this had a picture of him and Iago on the desk. He seated himself at the desk, almost with a small pleasure.

"Well, as you know by now, I am the mayor of this fine, little town," he told me. "It might not be sultan, but it will have to do… I guess."

Another small memory dawned on me; he was as power-hungry as any of the bad guys here. This place was pretty simple for a city hall, but any kind of power would please him. But then again, so would all the other villains! The town was getting more interesting and creepy with every encounter. If Jafar was the Mayor, what were all the other villains' jobs? I was going to find out soon enough.

"You came at exactly the right time Bill!" he continued.

"You know my name Mr. Mayor?" I asked. I felt super silly for calling him that, evil sorcerer was more like it.

"Oh silly news reporter, your boss called here only a few minutes ago!" he laughed.

"What did he want?" I asked. I really didn't want to ask too many questions, but I was curious.

"He says that you will be filming a documentary this week!" he said with a touch of amusement. I couldn't believe it, my boss changed his mind! I wondered why he did that. My boss was a strange man who wanted his reporters to go to the most hostile places with the most news, and they always had trouble. I hoped that I wasn't going to have a terrible fate in this town. It wasn't called Eville for nothing.

Suddenly, the phone began to ring. Jafar scowled at this disturbance, but I was still trying to figure out why my boss sent me here. I could tell that Jafar was still trying to get used to this way of life. All the bad guys had to be suited to normal lifestyles somewhat, but what about the revered night time?

"Everyday, some fool has to call here about a certain this or certain that," he growled. He sighed and rolled his eyes as he picked it up.

"What do you want?!" he barked.

"Hey man! You shouldn't be in office after that stupid excuse of a campaign you cooked up!" an obnoxious voice barked back.

"Take a hike, stupid hyena! You can moan and pout for four more years for all I care!" Jafar shot back. He hung up and smiled triumphantly.

"Uh…campaign?" I asked.

"A long story I don't have the patience to talk of," he replied. I just left it at that.

"So Bill, the first thing you must do is take a tour of Eville," he told me. Oh how awesome. I get to go on a freaky tour of not-so historic Eville, and probably with Iago too! This man was so polarizing! No wonder women hated him!

"Why the look Bill?" he asked me. "Perhaps you are being intimidated by me?" How cool, he could read people's minds! And who doesn't love that super slick voice of his when he tries to kiss up to people! His face turned a little stern.

"Perhaps you are being…how should I put it…._skittish?_" he suggested. Oh ho, now he's getting into that snake-corners-mouse deal! He doesn't know Bill the News Reporter good enough! So this time, I tried to act braver.

"Mr. Mayor, I think I could handle this town just fine! Just let us interview you first before we go to the right places and we'll get this documentary up and running!" I told him. This seemed to be fine to him, because he beckoned the camera man to come inside.

"Fine, then let us get started with the interview first," he said. And so began my interview with Mayor Jafar.

"How did you become mayor?" I asked. My camera man was in the right spot to film it of course.

"First of all, the mayoral election is no fun and games. Everyone wanted it just as much as I did, and so you should get a fairly good glimpse of what it would have looked like," he explained. Oh yeah, I was sure the election was brutal all right.

"It became more of a survival of the fittest, and I was the strongest of all of them obviously. However, that mangy old lion Scar was my biggest opponent, and _any _opponents I face will be crushed. They say it was a smear campaign, but I found nothing wrong with it," he further continued.

After the weird interview was over, Mayor Jafar wanted me to get started with the tour immediately.

"Pete will take you downtown," he said. I hurried to the door.

"And whatever you do, watch out for Maleficent, she has been acting strange lately," he added.

Leaving the building relived, I told my camera man to stay put, because I was going to be doing some eavesdropping this time. Knowing him, he was going to be ridiculing me or planning my death behind my back, so I sneaked inside when Iago went to visit him.

"He will not survive Eville. If the fool dares to leave this town, he will be captured instantly! No one leaves from MY town!" he laughed.

"He'll go to Maleficent's anyway!" said Iago. Forget that! She's just as creepy as evil sorcerer! They both thought I was some, dumb reporter!

I smiled confidently to where Pete's tour bus would be. I had the town of Eville to investigate! And no dirty secrets or traps were going to stop me!


	3. Chapter 3 Two Crazy Women

Chapter 3 Two Crazy Women

Tour buses were always fun unless you had an obnoxious jerk at the wheel. He didn't bother me too much, but Pete is the kind of guy who would annoy people just for the fun of it. At least I wasn't with Mr. Polarizing anymore.

"Stop number one, Cruella's Fur Hall!" he said. Oh no, she even makes the slick sorcerer tolerable!

When we went inside, it looked like any normal fur store, except for the freaky woman at the counter of course. I don't know why she thinks that ugly fur coat fits on her. And what's with the black and white hair?! Her approach to fashion was weird!

"Is this that reporter?" she asked Pete.

"Yeah it's him, he'll stay around for a little while," he replied. That was a good sign; I wanted to leave this place badly.

"All the customers are gone during this time, so buy something! And remember, you break it you buy it!" she said. What a nice way to treat her only customer of the day. Interviewing her was going to be hairy. Well, I had to get used to it eventually, because when the infamous night parties happen, that's when the true villainy will be set on fire. Something told me that Maleficent might be there, maybe.

We looked around the strange, little shop, my cameraman filming during our look. She must have laid waste to the local wildlife, because there were all kinds of fur coats that would have unnerved living animals. However, some of the stuff was weird trinkets that didn't belong in a place like this. Either Cruella was selling random stuff, selling stuff Mayor Jafar told her to, or perhaps it was something deeper than even selling.

They looked more like something from Jafar's lair than anything, and what caught my eye the most was a large, bronze snake. Why did she have figurines of animals that naturally had no fur? I just had to ask.

"I can't tell you," she replied.

"Does he- but I stopped myself because Cruella gave me a furious glare.

"Just drop it!" she snapped.

"If someone like you knew what that was, this town would be no more!" she hissed.

Fine woman, I'll just drop it, but she'd be pretty dumb to think a news reporter wouldn't be curious about such things. They were all hiding something, I just knew it, but it was probably something so dark and wicked that it would expose this seemingly normal town as an evil lair! But anyway, I had to interview her about the business.

"So how did you start your business?" I asked.

"I worship furs darling, that's just the way I am. What woman wouldn't be?! Even that idiot across the street savors them as me!" she said.

"And who's that?" I asked.

"Medusa," she hissed. I could see across the street that _"Madame Medusa's Pawn Shop"_ was located right there.

"She likes jewelry Cruella" I told her.

"Whatever! Me and her are the fiercest rivals in town! Doesn't matter if it's business or drag races, we practically duel each other!" she ranted.

Suddenly, an equally wild lady stormed out of the shop and shook her fist at us.

"Did you get a customer?!" she screamed from the street. Cruella jumped out of the interview chair and marched to the street for the confrontation. There they go, two insane bad girls that were similar in evil antics, but apprently weren't untied in business of course.

"You idiot, I was in the middle of an interview! An INTERVIEW!" she yelled.

They started to complain, gripe, yell, and argue with each other non-stop, and I personally wanted to get out of there.

"Hop on board!" Pete called to us. We gladly followed him, my cameraman filming the entire scene. Not even villains get along with each other!


	4. Chapter 4 The Eville Town Song

Chapter 4 The Eville Town Song

My little tour took me to Hyena Meat Market, the strangest place I visited yet. Those hyenas handled the meat in a sloppy way, so I didn't buy anything off of them. At this point, the tour became a series of interviews. But at least no one was going to disturb me this time.

"So how is running your own business like?" I asked Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed.

"It ain't very easy, but we're starting to love the money," said Shenzi.

"Having trouble resisting the meat?" I asked

"Yeah, the meat's always makin' us drool! We had to have Ed run off somewhere!" Banzai explained.

"Out in town?" I asked a little surprised. They only shrugged.

"He doesn't hurt anybody out there as far I know," Shenzi replied.

Ed quietly sniggered until Banzai slapped him. I asked them if they got along with the other baddies.

"We don't hang out too much this early, but oh baby, you better watch out at night!" said Banzai.

The interview was soon over, and I left the meat market a little disturbed. If Ed could walk around town without a care, and the night parties were wild, that meant that there were no limits to the mayhem they could cause! If they thought the night parties were fun, then I was in for a pretty rough time.

I spent the reminder of the day at the local motel, hiding from the town of course. There was no way I would go around a place where the spooky residents plotted scary things for me behind my back. We journalists know what to do in such hostile environments, and leaving them was unfortunately not one of them.

Watching Disney cartoons from my room, I was unsure if I was curious or scared about the nightly event. Would they try to play fair with me? Or would they be like true bad guys and get rid of me right then and there? There was no doubt I was in a little sticky wicket all right.

Not so long later, night fell over Eville like a black curtain, and from my motel window I could see the town finally acting normal, only this was a different kind of normal. Virtually ever kind of minion scurried around the town in a rat like fashion than typical street crowds. All of a sudden, somebody barged into my room. I looked around to see Pete laying on the floor in a dizzy mood.

"Guess they didn't make the doors hard enough," he mumbled.

"Time to go I guess?" I said.

"Yep, they want ya," he replied. He stood up and escorted me out of the motel.

Whoa, the town square was _crawling _with all foul creatures of Disney. Pete had to knock several of them beside as we struggled to get through the rowdy bunch. They had picnics going on like it was still daylight, and I could identify several of the villain henchmen among the crowd. The only one that looked content in his spot was Kaa the python, who was hanging out with Iago.

When I finally reached the end, all the baddies cheered at a group of the top villains that I guessed were the city council. The one at the front of the line was Mayor Jafar of course, who looked so proud that he was somewhat blushing (ok, maybe not).

Among those in the city council were The Wicked Queen, Lady Tremaine, Cruella De Vil, Ursula, Gaston, Hades, Captain Hook, and Scar. But where was Maleficent? Maybe she was acting strange after all. I would have thought she would be in a setting like this.

"What a large crowd we have here tonight!" said Jafar. The crowd was cheering and hollering.

"Before we begin, I have someone special to introduce to you all!" he told them. Oh no.

"He is here to show this town to the world! Come here Bill!" he called to me. Oh how lovely.

I just tried to act normal on my way to the podium, the minions were cheering with delight anyway.

"I will give this man a special gift courtesy of Eville," he then said. Wonder what it was, an apple?

"I present you…a song!" he exclaimed. All of the villains prepared to sing the big song to come. I was done for.

**[Small Town Villainy]**

_In this town of villains_

_We always get the thrilln's_

_To scheme and dream and reap all day long… woo woo!_

_We may seem small and normal to you all_

_But we want to beat and kill you all_

_So we can just stand there and laugh… ha ha ha!_

_For we have made a small town villainy!_

_So be a bad boy and come along!_

_For the greatest, worst bash in our history!_

_The princess won't be around for very long!_

_At the entrance to our town_

_You can cry and weep all around_

_At the majesty of the silence of our streets!_

_But if you stay in the night_

_You will see something most might not like_

_That is the bash of the brash!_

_So go jump and holler and play_

_You might not be here the very next day_

_So stick around and see what we have!_

_You will be caught in our grasp_

_You will not be able to grasp_

_The hand of your fate!_

_You better run far away!_

_You better listen and stay away!_

_Or else be ready to face your doom!_

_You may be trapped and die the next day_

_Or perhaps be dismayed_

_At the sight of our bash!_

_For we have made a small town villainy!_

_So be a wise boy and stay the heck out!_

_For the greatest, worst bash in our history!_

_The prince might as well jump off a cliff!_

_Our moment has finally come!_

_Some said we may never become!_

_But at last, fate is on our side!_

_So prepare for the worst_

_Your time has now come_

_To face the villainy of our small town!_

_For we have made a small town villainy!_

_So be a good boy and come with us!_

_For the greatest, worst bash in our history!_

_The king will soon have lost his crown!_

_So welcome to our kingdom_

_You will learn to live with our freedom_

_And leave the fools that once had used you!_

_For power is our treat_

_And you will soon make it sweet_

_Once we reach our goals in their entirety!_

_For we have made a small town villiainy!_

_So be a great boy and join with us!_

_For the greatest, worst bash in our history!_

_The kingdom is now going to be OURS!_

Huge fireworks burst as Chernabog came out of the hill behind the town to join in.

"Now, let the festivities begin!" Jafar called to the crowd. But I wasn't there.

I was running like a mad man out of that town. I was going to escape this evil place!


	5. Chapter 5 Heroesburg

Chapter 5 Heroesburg

My ears were still drumming from their haunting song! Never before did I want to escape from something so unnerving! So what if I get fired?! My life is more important than this dangerous job! My fellow cameraman couldn't agree more, he was running with me too! Forget the documentary!

My flight through the neighborhood soon toke me to the outskirts of town, and for a little moment there I was afraid that somebody or something was going to capture me on my way out of the town like Jafar said. But to my surprise, nobody was around, probably partying at the horror fest back there.

"Where are we going Bill?!" my cameraman asked.

"We'll have to catch a ride!" I answered.

A bus stop was waiting along a winding road, and that was where we stayed to catch some breath. We could see the bad guys blaring loud music and shooting lasers and fire across the sky from our location, I was just glad to be gone from that crazy town!

I was about to get some shut eye until, to my amazement, a bus was coming. It stopped for us, and we gladly went into it. There were some ordinary people on this bus, and I thought about where to stay for a few days. Maybe Heroesburg would be a good place to visit! They would defiantly welcome us to their place a lot better. We could hopefully get some rest and relaxtion on our trip at long last.

It wouldn't be until about midnight when we were asleep in a new motel, and I actually slept in good peace for once! I had a cool dream about me and my boss running around Heroesburg having a good time. We ate at the local diner, played at the arcade, watched an awesome movie, and went to an amusement park with the good guys.

Morning arrived, and with my active energy I went to the nearby Heroesburg. It was also a normal small town, but it actually acted like a proper small town. There were people (mostly tourists) walking around, and at first I really didn't know what to do.

"Why welcome to Heroesburg sir!" said a very familiar voice.

"Is that you Mickey?" I asked.

Yep, it was the famous mouse himself, and out of all the people in the sidewalk, he personally chose to speak to me! That was yet another difference to the fake villains, heroes actually cared for people! But of course, this was Mickey Mouse, so he was going to be willing to speak to anybody.

"My name's Bill" I told him.

"Well Bill, how about you come with me for a minute?!" he replied.

He guided me to a local diner, and I was surprised to see most of the Disney Heroes there! There must have been a big party or get-together, because Hercules, Peter Pan, Aladdin, Simba, all the princes, and some of their sidekicks were right there at their huge table.

"Bill here had a pretty lively time last night did you Bill?!" he asked me.

"Wait, how did you know about that?" I asked him.

"I was there with your boss, almost begging him not to have you go to that…place" he replied.

There was a tough question I had to tell those heroes, and I had to break out in exclamation.

"Why did you guys not try to destroy that evil town of their's?!" I exclaimed.

"They're not trying to be serious" Hercules told me. I only returned a frown.

"They wanted to have me killed!" I replied. "Mayor Jafar! The two crazy women! Hyena Meat Market! A strange Maleficent! It's all Eville!"

I tried to calm myself down while the heroes stared at me funny. Mickey Mouse looked concerned, and was probably thinking about what was wrong with me. I was probably still shaken by last night, and I could tell that the heroes could understand the feeling too even though they were braver than me.

"Did I mention they have a disturbing song?" I asked.

"You probably just need to relax and have some fun!" said Mickey. "And this town is just perfect!"

For the rest of the day, I ate with the good guys, went to the arcade, watched an awesome movie exclusive to Heroesburg, and went to an amusement park with all of them. And my cameraman filmed the whole time. Wait a minute; it was just like my dream, but without my boss!

I learned that the Mayor of Heroesburg was Hercules, there was no courthouse because there was never any crime, and Timon and Pumbaa ran an insect shop were people with tough stomachs could eat all kinds of bugs on a stick, either in chocolate or fried.

"So where are the girls at?" I asked Mickey Mouse.

"They're going on a huge vacation" said Mickey. "Minnie's one of them, so that's how I know."

"I wish I could stay here, but my boss still wants me at… you know" I said.

"You have a very strange boss Bill" Mickey replied. "I'm actually a little afraid of him."

Mickey Mouse was afraid of my boss? From what I see of him, he acts like a very cheerful, jubilant man. He was a master at talking and connecting to people. However, he was also a little on the mysterious side, being hush-hush on such topics like the never-ending struggle between good and evil.

"I saw something in Aladdin's carpet store I didn't like all to well" he continued.

"Of all things, there was a crow statue in the far corner! And I heard there's also stuff in the bad guy's stores that sold pixie dust!" he told me.

That was strange business. Stores run by heroes had villain merchandise, and villain stores had hero merchandise! That didn't make any sense!

Too bad I didn't have much time to think, because from out of nowhere, Pete appeared in a cop uniform and handcuffed me right then and there!

"Pete! Let him go!" Mickey scolded.

"No way Mickey, this man snuck out of Eville, and he needs to go back immediately!" he said.

He tossed me into his police car and drove me off.

"Why are you a cop and a tour guide?" I asked.

"I change jobs all the time" he replied. "Oh yeah, the villains were so happy when they found out you ran away!"

Ah oh, I can sense sarcasm a mile away. The Disney Villains were most defiantly not happy. I bet Jafar was giggling like a schoolgirl when I was away!


	6. Chapter 6 Unlucky Me

Chapter 6 Unlucky Me

Most of Eville turned out to the courthouse to see my standoff with fate. Remarkably, I wasn't as afraid of them as I used to be. I was getting determined to defend myself against those bad guys that thought I broke a law with them. I wondered why they had a court system anyway since they would normally throw me in a cell and toss the key. That was more reason to be hopeful.

Judge Frollo sat on his perch high above everyone, and I was sitting with my cameraman as the only defendant. It was too bad he was busy filming everybody at the scene. The jury was made up of normal, little minions. The Queen of Hearts was the prosecutor.

"This court will now come to order" said Frollo.

"He is charged with fleeing from Eville after curfew" he said. That was pure bogus!

"Sentence first, verdict afterward! Off with his head!" the Queen of Hearts thundered. She made a pretty good prosecutor.

"Beheading? Ewwwwwww" Jafar and Iago groaned in unison.

"Very well, I hereby sentence Bill to beheading" Frollo concluded. They have to be kidding me. The Queen of Hearts smiled delightfully.

"Splendid! To the town square!" she commanded.

"No!" I cried in pity. "Please! I'll do anything! I'll… I stopped immediately because I just said the worst words to say in a situation like this.

Jafar came up to the front, smiling devilishly at me.

"_Anything?_" he asked in that slick voice.

"Uh… yeah" I muttered. What would he order me to do?

"Do you know what they are doing?" he asked.

"You mean the heroes? They're doing fine, the princesses are on a vacation" I said.

At this, he and all the other villains smiled wickedly. I just gave them ideas… I failed the good guys.

"Why the sad look Bill? Feel like you betrayed your arrogant, little heroes? Too bad" he hissed.

Judge Frollo thought about this, and finally made his decision.

"I sentence Bill to helping us in foiling the princess vacation. Court adjourned!" he proclaimed.

With a smack of his gavel, the villains and minions left the courthouse in a very happy mood. I left the place in a very sour mood.

"There is no need to worry Bill, we can welcome you to Eville if you do as we say and become one of us" Jafar told me.

"Frankly Mr. Mayor, I think you might as well jump off a cliff" I snapped. He snickered and shook his head.

"You will learn… believe me… you will know" he said. Stupid Mayor Jafar, I ought to smack him so hard!

I couldn't hurt or harass the Disney Princesses, only low-life villains do that! I would tag along, but I would try to secretly help the princesses somehow. I'll tell the heroes the villains' antics, start a crazy battle, and hopefully leave this place in ruins.

After all, the heroes always defeat the villains right?

_A/N: Sorry it's a little short, I'll update very soon._


	7. Chapter 7 Princess Harassment

Chapter 7 Princess Harassment

So where did the Disney Princesses go for the start of their trip? The local park for a picnic! That is a pretty vulnerable place for them to hang out, because the Disney Villains were cooking up very mean plans that really explained how much they disliked these poor girls.

It was a nice day too, which made me feel even sorrier. I wondered how I could save the girls from the pranks, and the only thing I knew was that this was going to be hard to pull off. They were going to keep an eye on me the whole time, so I would have to think of something.

"There they are" said Mayor Jafar. We were hiding behind the trees like a pack of wolves.

They had their food and everything on a large, beautiful carpet, completely vulnerable of course.

"Do you have it Iago?" he asked his sidekick parrot.

"Yep, this is gonna be fun!" he snickered. He flew over to the carpet with a jar of ants in his mouth, and snapped it open for the little bugs to crawl all over the food as though it were a playground. The bad guys snickered with glee.

Not too long later, Belle came to the area; I couldn't bear to see the prank unfold.

"Oh no, we must have put it too close to an ant hill!" said Belle.

"No! Not my pie!" Belle exclaimed. The used-to-be-delicious apple pie was the hardest hit; it had nothing but a mound of black on top of it.

As she walked away in disgust, the villains could hardly contain themselves.

"That's what she gets for rejecting me all these years" said Gaston.

I just had to help them in some way. These villains would go mad if I left them again, so I had to make up a evil prank of my own.

"How about I put some honey to replace their shampoo?" I suggested.

"Excellent idea, I'll have Iago go with you" said Jafar. I figured as such anyway, he'll have to go somehow.

So I left the villains with Iago, carrying my own bag of mischief items that I was going to have to use for something good. But first, Iago here had to be distracted while I go warn the princesses. With that, I pulled out a pair of long poles. Iago was known for doing this in shallow ponds.

"Hey Iago, how about you see what Ariel's doing over there in the lake?" I asked.

"Ah sure, but you better not do something stupid!" he replied. He strapped to the two poles and waded into the pond like a heron. I crept through the camp site to see a giant pink RV with a collection of tents and a fire place. Minnie and Daisy were there chatting, and I tried to come out in a way not to surprise them. I walked out in the open, and the two of them looked curious as though they were wondering where I came from.

"Excuse me, but I think you girls might want to go somewhere else" I told them.

"Why? This place is wonderful! The flowers are all bloomed and the sun is shining, why leave?" asked Minnie.

"Because villains are out to get you that's why" I replied. They gasped and looked around fearfully.

"What do they want?" Daisy asked.

"Nothing, they just want to bully" I answered. At this, they frowned with contempt.

"That's just not right! They've been acting strange ever since they started building their town. And the boys had to build their town too!" said Minnie.

We couldn't think about it much longer, because a bunch of crazy sounds and shrieks were coming from all corners.

"They're still pulling pranks! You have to get out of here!" I exclaimed.

"That parrot tossed a tadpole in my dress!" complained Ariel.

"Someone is shaking leaves all over the ground!" said Aurora.

"Someone threw my book in the mud!" Belle complained.

"Someone put crackers all over my tent, burped, and left a "I love you princess!" letter outside!" said Jasmine. I wonder who would do that?!

"Someone actually dumped ashes on me!" said Cinderella.

"WHO'S DOING THIS?!" they screamed.

"You all have to go in the RV!" I told them. They gladly went inside, and I toke the wheel to escape this place for good! I drove us out of there in a hurry, and we almost left the camp site until a giant banana appeared and sent us into a tailspin!

We spun around three times before calming down to see the bad guys that were dieing with laughter. And for a villain, that was almost suffocation.

Mayor Jafar, my goodness, I thought he dumped into a pool of paint! He was holding himself from laughing so hard, that his face was purple and blue with his eyes bulging out. When he finally contained himself, he blew a kiss at Jasmine, who only glared into his soul.

The other bad guys were rolling around on the floor. Ursula was reeling all over with her tentacles flailing about. Gaston was going overboard, laughing and pounding the ground. They were all hysterical, and the girls were too enraged for words.

I drove us away from the camp site, but not until a huge water balloon burst on top of us, soaking us more than a car wash. I was pretty fed up.

When we went to Heroesburg, I thought the heroes were going to be so mad… but they were thinking of something else.

"If they think it's funny to pull pranks on the princesses, then how about we humiliate them?" Aladdin suggested.

"What do you all mean?" I asked them.

Hercules told me this. "One word… sports."

Oh, I got it now. The Disney Villains were mostly a bunch of old geezers. Playing sports against the Disney Heroes was almost hopeless for them.

That is, if they try to do something else.


	8. Chapter 8 Our Heroic Revenge

Chapter 8 Our Heroic Revenge

We came down the road to see the big bad guys fall down. Things were finally starting to work out for me. With the athletic heroes at my side, those dumb villains would be child's play. I was looking forward to seeing stick-thin Jafar get owned by Aladdin in Basketball. Oh it was going to be so good.

The arch-enemies met at a field in Eville, a standoff with both sides glaring at each other with a burning drive for the win. I was going to be choosing what sport we'll play, and I wanted to choose something the villains would suck at, but I wasn't so good at sports myself.

"Let's start with...track and field" I said. At pole-vault, Aladdin dominated the competition with some of his fellow heroes. Gaston was the only bad guy to make it over the pole. The discus was a easy game for the good guys too, while the bad guys were at a loss. Too bad I was with them in althletics.

"Time out!" called Hades. "We can't stand the unfairness here!"

"_Yeah, and you'll start to get unfair with us" _I thought. They huddled around to angrily whisper to each other, not a very good sign. When they were done, they smiled mischievously at us. I bet they were probably wanting to play golf next, the kind of sport I would rule in. That would be bad for the others.

"We would be fools for letting you humiliate us as you please, so we are simply going to do what WE want!" said Jafar. With a large pop, they all disappeared. The heroes were obviously disappoitned as much as I was. It was just too unfair to not see what could have been some funny moments.

"What a bunch of cowards!" Peter Pan scoffed.

"Uh… I wouldn't celebrate yet" I muttered fearfully. My fears were accurate, because they appeared a second later to shower us with water balloons!

"What is up with water balloons?" I yelled. As much as they wanted to fight, we had to retreat, and the last thing we heard was evil laughter.

"What are we supposed to do now? They defied our rules!" I exclaimed.

"You have much to learn Bill" someone told me. I turned around to see no one there.

"We'll just have to think of something else" said Hercules.

So we returned to Heroesburg, and we finally decided to give the villains' their own medicine. We returned to Eville, where we would wait for the night party to begin. Our plan...was to ruin the evil fun of their night party! And we would make sure we were going to crash it royally!

After they sang that cursed song, we snuck around the busy park as perfectly hidden as possible, and we spied some of minions playing with fireworks. Once they lit up a large piece of firework, they sccuried away, giving us a chance to top it over on the ground. It was pointing at the audience, and we quickly retreated from the scene with all our might, for it was going to be huge.

The fireworks exploded toward the audience of minions, and their eyes were huge as it shot to them like fireworks. There was huge explosions and frightful scearms as minions were sent in all directions. The fireworks contiued to fire at the crowd, blowing up tons of lamn chairs and picnic tables. While that was causing mayhem, we put our attention to other fireworks, lighting them up to fire at the parties.

It wasn't long before Mayor Jafar and the city council noticed what we were doing, but it too late for them. A fireball exploded at their pedestal, which knocked them off their feet, resulting in the landings of their bottoms. We snickered our way out of the city park as fast as we can.

"I wish I could hang out with you guys!" I told them.

"You sure can Bill! I oughta tell your boss to cancel this whole sheniagan!" Mickey told me.

That was cool, because the villains would defiantly want my head if I came back! I wondered who it was taht told I would learn eariler at Eville Field, but I was going to put that off for later, because I had more fun moments left to be had at Heroesburg. The town that was really for me!


	9. Chapter 9 Mysteries Abound

Chapter 9 Mysteries Abound

What a great feeling it was to finally mess with the villains! They'll probably know by now that I'm by no means a pushover. But I had to be careful for now on, because they were going to come for me eventually. I knew that they were hopping mad about our antics the other night.

The Disney Heroes were well aware of this too, and they wanted me to stay in Heroesburg for a while until the villains calmed down. Mickey had to go explain to my boss about my whole ordeal, and he told him to come see him in Heroesburg. We waited for his arrival from Mickey's Office.

"Well Bill, he should be comin' here any minute now" he said.

"He should understand all the things I've been through, you just can't deal with villains!" I said.

The door to Mickey's room opened to reveal the short, cubby man that was my boss. His name was Milton Youngblood.

"Why hello Mickey and Bill! How's the documentary been going for you?!" he asked me.

"Actually Mr. Youngblood, it's not going so well" I said. He looked at me with a concerned look, but quickly replaced it with his usual toothy grin.

"Ah figures as such Bill, the Disney Villains are a sneaky bunch anyway! I would have expected you had known that when you first started!" he replied. Of course I knew what they were capable of, but as I mentioned earlier, I thought the small town business was a joke.

"Mr. Youngblood sir, I would kinda like to mention one little thing" said Mickey.

"And what's that my little mouse?" he replied.

"Don't you think it's kinda… silly to put Bill in such a place in the first place?" he asked.

"….perhaps… but the world must know what's going on in these two towns!" said Milton.

"Would people _really _haveta know this whole thing?" Mickey questioned.

"It's a very strange event that needs to be reported on! I'm sure Bill isn't very afraid or ashamed in some way about it aren't you Bill?" he asked me. I might as well have told him about my bitterness, so I told him about how they treated me, my first escape from Eville, the fun of Heroesburg, their faulty court system, and the villains' pestering of the princesses. He was thinking critically on every topic, and when Milton Youngblood is thinking, it's usually something very deep and secret.

"Interesting…" he mumbled.

"You know what Bill? I do believe this documentary thing is not well-made enough, why not you delve deeper into the villains' secrets further?" he suggested. That really didn't sit too well for me, because I was pretty much fed up with investigating their games by now.

"Of course, you won't be playing games with them either" he said.

"So are you gonna stop the documentary anytime soon?" Mickey asked.

"Why no Mickey Mouse! That documentary is absolutely vital to my company! No, Bill must dig deeper until the gold is found!" he told him.

He began to walk away, and there was still one thing I had to ask.

"Why are the shops in both towns selling strange merchandise?" I asked.

"That is for you to find out!" he replied. And he left without another word.

Mickey Mouse sighed, obviously feeling a little sorry for me.

"Well pal, it looks like you gotta solve the mystery of the weird merchandise" he said.

This was getting really ridiculous. I was a reporter, not a detective! However, it was something the boss requested, so to the shops of Heroesburg I went. My walk through town made me curious about another event, Maleficent's strange behavior. I thought at the time that Milton wouldn't mind if I decided to investigate that mystery, so I chose to somehow plan a secret trip to Eville.

That night, Aladdin allowed me to ride Carpet to Eville in thte dead of night, even long after their night party. I was as nervious as I could be, because night is when the most active bad guys are active. The first place I thought was a possible hiding place was the freaky mansion I saw on the first day, so I flew off to the front of that creepy place. But to my surprise, Jafar and Iago were right there!

"Well, this is quite a surprise!" Jafar laughed.

"I'm not your pet anymore you slick sorceror! What are you doing here?!" I asked.

"I could say the same to you!" he repiled. "And is that Aladdin's magic carpet? Oooh.... you have gone too far!"

I smiled with content, which was a bad idea because it reminded him of a certain someone.

"Fly away you silly reporter! I have an extremely important meeting to attend to!" he complained.

"Oh really? Well I'm just going to go see who you're talking about!" I said. "Let's go inside carpet!" Mayor Jafar and Iago blocked our way inside.

"No! You must not go in!" said Jafar.

"Don't even think about it pal! You'll regret it SO much!" said Iago.

But I completely ignored their warnings, and crashed past them to burst through the ancient door and arrive in a dark room.

A dark figure was slumped over on a stone throne, and I was too petrified to fly away. She glared at me with those piercing, yellow eyes.

"What are you doing here?!" she snarled.


	10. Chapter 10 Good and Evil

Chapter 10 Good and Evil

I only floated in that spot with pure shock and horror. So she stayed in this dusty mansion all this time! Not even attending the night parties or any kind of socializing. Too bad I didn't have much time to think why. She stood up and power walked to me. Her raven Diablo was also mad.

"Well?!" she snapped. Wow, what a darkly voice she possessed.

"I'm Bill the News Reporter, and what are you… silence!" she interrupted me.

"For days I have held on to my wrath in this mansion, the only dark and scary one in town!" she ranted. Jafar and Iago stood back up on their feet, rubbing their knocked heads before they stared at the evil fairy in surprise. They tired to walk over to Maleficent to explain.

"Mistress Maleficent, please disregard that reckless fool that just barged in!" said Jafar.

Maleficent stared at him with a very cold and angry look that made me shiver.

"You have some explaining to do my little vizier" she told him. Jafar shook his head.

"Correction, you mean little _mayor_" he corrected her. But she wasn't in the mood for corrections.

"Do you all call yourselves villains?! You are a disgrace to evil!" She scolded him.

Her ranting began to attract the attention of some villains that were curious to see her finally out of her scary mansion.

"Have you lost your minds?! Have you given up lust, greed, pride, gluttony, sloth, rage, and envy for partying?!" She ranted.

The other villains only stared at her with frowns. Mayor Jafar sighed.

"I suppose you need a breather from your musty mansion! I bet you were lusting for power like I was! Or perhaps greedy for all the spoils of money you would have had! Maybe you were prideful about yourself, since you were being the reclusive one that held the power of evil and darkness for your own use. Your gluttony of rotten fruits that were inside your mansion was appalling to me the last time I came to visit. You being slothful on your stone throne for hours on end is strange behavior. You are being full of rage all the time because you hate this town so much. And now you envy me because I am the mayor of Eville, is that correct?" he said.

I was hanging my jaw, who knew villains would know their bad personality traits so much? Maleficent smiled, which really surprised me.

"You hit it exactly on the head" she told him. Her smile was completely gone.

"But you have forgotten one, very small fact" she then said. "I want this town remodeled."

With a move that shocked everybody, she turned into her giant dragon form and began to breathe fire on all the buildings in town. Mayor Jafar was shaking his fist at her in protest. She toke out the City Hall, some of the shops, and the town square, where leftover fireworks blew up into the sky.

"What do you thing you're doing?! Stop destroying my town!" he yelled.

"YOUR TOWN?!" the other villains yelled. Jafar stopped dead in his tracks and made a worried look.

"Oops… shouldn't have said that" he mumbled. Pandemonium feuds soon started.

"You see everybody! Yet another dishonest politician!" yelled Banzai.

"I challenge you to a drag race!" Cruella barked at Medusa.

"Double the powder and shorten the fuse! The reporter is going to be dead in the news!" Captain Hook ordered to the pirates.

I tried to run away as cannonballs and fireworks were being fired at my direction. There was plenty of smoke to be floating around town, coming from the fire and the villains. They were busy arguing to each other while I was busy trying to escape, and I dodged a couple of reckless cars driven by Cruella and Medusa. The outskirts of town were soon near me when the last villain I wanted to see showed up.

Chernabog came up from the large hill to glare at the battle being fought amongst the bad guys. Dragon Maleficent and Snake Jafar were wrestling each other, and another person to appear from up the road was Milton Youngblood, who smiled a strange smile.

"Why hello Bill! I have come to do my thing" he told me. I could see that the heroes were with him too, but they didn't look very happy at all.

"Enough with this good and evil nonsense! Why not we be our own masters!" he told me.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Good and evil will never get along, but I want to be my own master, and we should take the middle path instead of both!" he told me.

"You can't have be in the middle of good and evil! You have to be one or the other!" I said. He chuckled and rubbed his mustahe a little.

"I'm afraid that cannot be done Bill! Your camraman is filming the whole scene this moment!" he told me. I turned around to see him fliming the battle being waged in the flaming Eville, now looking more and more like a truly evil place. He turned to see the sad-looking heroes.

"As you can see, the system of good and evil is broken" said Milton to the developing documentary.

"You have the evil fighting among each other, and you have the good doing nothing about it. We all have our faults, and we cannot be entirely good or evil. These towns truly symobolize the animosity both sides have, the good is good and the bad is bad. It has been a of system since the dawn of time, and we should not follow it any longer. Finally, we should be our own masters, and cast out the angels and demons that have been peer- pressuring as for all time! We humans need more balance, and there is no argument here..." I couldn't bear to listen to him further.

He was saying something that was beyond thinking and comprehension. He was going to put this in the WIKA News, in front of many people!

I yanked the camera away and tossed it into the fire below. Milton Youngblood stood there in shock.

"What did you do Bill?" he asked me.

"You're abusing the powers of journalism and TV huh?" I asked him. "You're trying to put your crazy philosophies in viewers minds?!"

He didn't say anything, and I looked to see Eville completely gone. All that stood were the Disney Villains in a sour mood.

"Never again" said Maleficent. "Enough of this foolishness! This town generated too much attention! Partying is not the evil way!"

Former Mayor Jafar looked tired and defeated, his plans and ambitions beaten not only by the very same bad guys, but ultimately by me.

"We will rebuild in a even more isolated place! I am still the mayor!" he said. Maleficent smiled and shook her head.

"Correction, you mean little _vizier_" she corrected him. But he wasn't in the mood for corrections.

"I have to go back to.... UGH!" he protested. "I don't want to go back to that big, stupid palace and the two living in it!"

Hades came over and patted him on the shoulder while he looked around miserably.

"Hey man, you did a pretty good job schemeing and everything, I'll give you that" he told him. The Disney Heroes were pretty much relieved.

"Yeah, I think this small town thing is fun and all, but we gotta head back home" said Mickey.

"I couldn't agree more" said Simba. I was sure ready to go back home, because I still wanted to get most of the story on TV so everyone could watch it. Everyone was happy again, except for that corrupt, crazy man that was my boss. He was sent away back to our studio at WIKA News to get grilled.

"You must be pretty tired" Aladdin told me.

"Defiantly, but it was all really fun" I repiled. I couldn't wait to see how the documentary would go.


	11. Chapter 11 Fun on Both Sides

Chapter 11 Fun on Both Sides

The night "Small Town Villainy" aired on TV, tons of viewers watched it. It had so much critical acclaim and popularity that it had to be made into a special DVD, which sold like hotcakes. The whole experience turned out to not just help the studio, but me as well.

I suddenly became a big celebrity around WIKA News, while Milton Youngblood was removed from office in shame. It almost kind of saddened many people that Eville was gone, but they would soon find out that the villains were rebuilding Eville after a long, intense debate with the always stubborn Maleficent.

Don't feel too bad about former mayor Jafar (who would?) because he got his job back. The reason why was because the poor things he did in office were actually good credentials for villains, so he wasn't thrown out. Maleficent finally learned to have some fun for once, and decided that even evil needs some fun every now and then. Cruella De Vil and Medusa got over their feud because nobody would hardly buy their stuff anyway, and as to the mystery of the strange merchandise, it was put there by Milton Youngblood to try to make me more of a detective than just a regular reporter.

So even though it sounds like the end of my story is coming, there's still one thing that I need to tell you. It's the deal with what the Disney Heroes would try to do. They were the ones that started their town after the other one, and so they had to make their decision too.

Although it sounded like a lot of fun to play around their own small town, they decided that things were better off being back home, because the reason why is that they couldn't handle having two different lives. The villains, loving to have all the different lives and powers that they could have, were enjoying their second life while their first one is crumbling. This actually helped the good guys, since with no villains around to cause trouble; they could live in their true home with ease.

This brings me to my final conclusion, the building of fun. The one purpose of those two small towns was simply fun. Although villains think fun is bullying princesses and heroes, Eville was just a place to hang out. Heroesburg was a place that was used for the same thing. Good and evil are polar opposites, but they both love their fun. There was one good place for that

"Welcome to Walt Disney World everyone!" I called to everyone.

Both sides were there to not just have fun, but have fun against each other. Today the events were a bunch of games designed to show the never-ending fight in a more fun way, and it was great to see the arch-enemies playing those games against each other without the usual hate.

"What's with the water baloons Hades?" Hercules asked him.

"You keep putting out my hair all the time, so I'll just use it on you!" he repiled.

"You sure know your way around here Jafar" Aladdin told him as he struggled to move around the crowded Main Street U.S.A.

"These cursed people and their baby strollers!" he complained.

"Wow, what a great place you chose for our trip Bill!" Mickey Mouse told me. I smiled around this happy place, this was the real purpose of the park, to have everyone that entered its gates to feel the magic of adventure of the never-ending fight. It made it almost seem cool.

"Come on Mickey, let's go see what's going on at Tomorrowland" I said. The whole day was a great day, and that is the end of my story.

**The End**


End file.
